Congratulations! The new family member has arrived. The following eight weeks will be a unique period of bonding and adaptation for parents, baby, and siblings. In this month’s article, we will look at how to foster nourishing interactions with your newborn and how to prepare the environment to make the transition from the womb to the outside world as gentle as possible.
You finally got to meet your baby, and now you have his direct presence in your life. You can touch him, hug him and watch him sleep. The next couple of weeks are considered a symbiotic period of life between the mother and the baby.
Why is it Symbiotic?
You and your baby are partners. You both have something to exchange that benefits the other. When breastfeeding, you provide him the right food with all the antibodies and nutrients he needs. Meanwhile, he will help your uterus to contract and shrink back to its previous size and position when sucking the milk. Breastfeeding is ideal, but if for some reason your baby cannot be breastfed, bottle feeding is equally important. It is a moment of connection between the mom and the child; it creates a special attachment and should be respected.
Your Newborn’s Points of Reference
When your baby was born, he came with special memories related to what happened during pregnancy; these are called “points of reference.” Some of them are from your body, like your heartbeat and voice. Others are from his body, such as touching his face with his hands, moving his legs and arms, and probably even sucking his thumb. It is essential to realize that these points of reference will help him transition smoothly from the womb to the outside world; even if he is not in the same place as before and the situation has changed, these points of reference will give the baby security. It is essential that immediately after birth, all adults respect the continuation of the basic points of reference.
Very often, we see newborns tightly swaddled with hand mitts and using a pacifier. These popular items hinder all of the points of reference. The child can no longer move as he did in the womb; he cannot touch his face or suck his thumb. There is no continuity of the memories he had in the womb; there is no familiarity with the previous experiences he had before birth.
When using a blanket to keep your newborn warm, make sure he can move his limbs freely. Naturally, your baby wants to move. Some adults think it is very cute when babies fight the swaddle and free themselves of them, and in response, the adult swaddles him even tighter to prevent him from moving again. This is proof of the natural desire the baby has to move and connect to what he previously did in the womb. We should not be an obstacle for this. You can keep him warm without swaddling him.
At ten weeks of gestation, your baby starts developing touch receptors on his face, and later on, he started touching his face daily using his hands until the moment he his born. Therefore, if a newborn wears hand mitts, he will be deprived of this personal point of reference. If the parents are concerned about the baby scratching his face, the solution is to trim the nails of the baby carefully. There are many nail clippers for newborns that can be purchased online or in-store. This will allow the baby to keep touching his face like he did when he was in the womb.
Skin to Skin
This is an opportunity given to the mom to place the baby directly on her skin immediately after birth. It helps the baby regulate his body temperature and to recognize the smell of the mom and the sound of her heartbeat. This is not exclusively for moms that have a vaginal delivery. It is beneficial for babies born through a c-section too, and for any loving family member that wants to have skin to skin time with the baby, such as the father, siblings and grandparents. In addition, this is not reserved for the day of delivery only; it is also recommended to be done through the entire symbiotic period!
Peaceful Atmosphere
Parents should aim to provide a calm atmosphere for the baby in the first couple of weeks. This is an intimate moment for the family to bond with the new family member. If friends and coworkers want to come and meet the baby, coordinate with them to do it after the symbiotic period. Let your baby establish a solid relationship with his new environment first. Protect the tenderness he needs and be mindful of exposing him to agitated and loud environments.
Item of the Month
The Munari Mobile
Bruno Munari (1907-1998), an Italian architect, created the Munari Mobile. It is a mobile made out of three black and white cardboard shapes and a glass sphere. Since the newborn’s sense of sight is not fully developed yet, only shades of gray, black, and white will be appreciated in the first weeks of life. That is why this mobile is very attractive to young babies. The glass sphere allows the child to appreciate the light that it reflects. There are many handmade options to buy at Etsy.com. Here are some links to different ones:
This is an instant download for a do it yourself option:
This is an assembled Montessori Munari Mobile:
An Option from Amazon (fully assembled):
Book of the Month
Understanding the Human Being: The Importance of the First Three Years of Life by Silavana Quattrocchi Montanaro, M.D
This a great book to read during pregnancy or the first three years of the life of your baby. It has crucial and timeless information about our role as adults in the development of children. It touches on aspects that are unseen and often forgotten, such as the human needs we all have as children and how to satisfy them. It is based on many hours of scientific observations, and topics like weaning, communication, movement, and development crises are enlightened in this rich
Amazon copy: https://www.amazon.es/Understanding-Human-Being-Importance-Montessori/dp/187934100X
